how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Randomize
