Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
