Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
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