Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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