More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
