Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
my poor anus
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
