Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Randomize
