quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
