Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Ketchup is God's man juice
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
