Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
