I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
