Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
