dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
