You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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