You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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