just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
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