Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
