you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
