White coat. Heels.
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize
