If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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