dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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