somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
You're a waste of cheezeits
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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