you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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