i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
