ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
