we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
