tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
