It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
You smell like stripper and shame
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
