Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
