We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
