Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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