porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
It's Friday. Sex?
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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