Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
