What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I think i got beer on your cat.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize