Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
