He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize
