running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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