So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
