She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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