it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Randomize
