break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
