i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Randomize
