But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Randomize
