I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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