what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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