Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
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