I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
you mean i was at the winter classic?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
