we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Send help, water and tortillas.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
