I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
