I can't watch pbs sober anymore
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Randomize
