he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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