My boss' voice literally gives me gas
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
